Kali ini, saya bisa merasa senang karena dia telah pergi jauh.
Sebab, jika dia masih ada di dekat saya....
entahlah, saya mungkin tidak mau bicara dengannya selama seminggu.
Minggu, 28 Agustus 2011
Kamis, 25 Agustus 2011
Forum Bahasa dan Sastra Media Aesculapius 2011
Media Aesculapius FKUI mempersembahkan"Forum Bahasa dan Sastra 2011"
Forum Bahasa dan Sastra 2011
event:
- Lomba Sastra
- Pameran Sastra
- Talkshow
Event terdekat:
Lomba Sastra,
apa itu lomba sastra?
Lomba sastra terdiri dari tiga jenis materi, yaitu cerita pendek (cerpen), puisi, dan fotografi. Lomba ini terbuka untuk umum dan mengusung tema “Menapaki Jalan Hidup dengan Sastra”. Kegiatan ini bertujuan memotivasi generasi muda untuk menciptakan karya-karya sastra yang berkualitas. Penjurian lomba akan dilakukan oleh sejumlah tokoh yang telah lama berkiprah dalam dunia sastra Indonesia.
Kapan deadlinenya?
Lomba ini dibuka mulai:
1 Agustus-16 September 2011 cap pos (naskah diterima di meja panitia paling lambat 23 September 2011)
Apa persyaratannya?
Persyaratan peserta :
1. Karya orisinil (bukan jiplakan) dan belum pernah dipublikasikan.
2. Karya tidak mengandung unsur SARA, kekerasan, atau pornografi.
3. Setiap peserta dikenakan biaya pendaftaran Rp 25.000,00/peserta/jenis lomba. Administrasi dapat dilakukan langsung di Sekretariat Media Aesculapius atau ditransfer ke rekening Bank BCA No. Rek. 4741060684 a.n. Davrina Rianda.
4. Setiap peserta boleh mengirimkan maksimal 2 karya (untuk jenis yang sama) dalam satu amplop.
5. Melampirkan identitas (nama lengkap, alamat lengkap, nomor telepon, dan email yang bisa dihubungi).
6. Melampirkan fotokopi/scanning kartu identitas (KTP/KTM/SIM).
7. Melampirkan fotokopi/scanning bukti pembayaran.
8. Karya yang berhasil melalui tahap seleksi akan ditampilkan dalam Pameran Sastra Forum Bahasa dan Sastra 2011 pada 19-22 Oktober 2011.
9. Semua peserta lomba DIHARAPKAN hadir dalam acara puncak Forum Bahasa dan Sastra pada 22 Oktober 2011.
Persyaratan Lomba Cerpen:
1. Naskah diketik di kertas ukuran A4, jenis huruf Times New Roman, ukuran huruf 12, spasi 1,5, margin 2 cm rata kiri-kanan, panjang naskah 6-9 halaman.
2. Naskah dapat dikirim langsung ke sekretariat MA atau via pos dalam bentuk print-out 2 rangkap disertai soft copy dalam CD.
3. Cantumkan sinopsis cerita maksimal 1/2 halaman.
4. Di bagian kiri atas amplop dituliskan LOMBA CERPEN FBS 2011.
Persyaratan Lomba Puisi:
1. Naskah diketik di kertas A4, jenis huruf Times New Roman, ukuran huruf 12, spasi 1,5, margin 5 cm rata kiri-kanan, panjang naskah maksimal 2 halaman atau 3000 karakter.
2. Naskah dapat dikirim langsung ke sekretariat MA atau via pos dalam bentuk print-out 2 rangkap disertai soft copy dalam CD.
3. Di bagian kiri atas amplop dituliskan LOMBA PUISI FBS 2011.
Persyaratan Lomba Fotografi :
1. Foto dicetak dalam ukuran 12R 30x40.
2. Foto dapat berwarna atau hitam putih.
3. Sertakan soft copy dengan format JPEG dalam CD.
4. Rekayasa digital diizinkan sebatas sama dengan yang biasa dilakukan dalam kamar gelap fotografi film dan tidak melakukan proses penggabungan beberapa foto; manipulasi hanya sebatas koreksi warna/kontras; editing sebatas leveling dan saturation, bukan hasil retouch maupun manipulasi komputer lainnya.
5. Cantumkan judul foto berikut keterangan singkat makna foto mencakup 5W1H. 6. Di bagian kiri atas amplop dituliskan LOMBA FOTOGRAFI FBS 2011.
Ke mana mengirimkan hasil karyamu???
Kirimkan karya beserta seluruh persyaratan secara langsung atau via pos ke
Sekretariat Media Aesculapius
Jalan Salemba Raya 6
Jakarta Pusat 10430
atau
via email ke fbsma2011@gmail.com (khusus cerpen dan puisi, untuk fotografi harus dicetak dan dikirimkan ke Sekretariat Media Aesculapius)
Pemenangnya?
Pemenang:
1. Pemenang terdiri dari juara 1, 2, 3 dan dipilih melalui tahap penjurian
2. Keputusan juri bersifat final dan tidak dapat diganggu gugat.
3. Pemenang diumumkan pada acara puncak Forum Bahasa dan Sastra pada tanggal 22 Oktober 2011.
Hadiahnya??
woooww...
Juara 1: Rp 1.000.000,00 + Sertifikat + Voucher berlangganan SKMA 2 tahun
Juara 2: Rp 750.000,00 + Sertifikat + Voucher berlangganan SKMA 1 tahun
Juara 3: Rp 500.000,00 + Sertifikat + Voucher berlangganan SKMA 6 bulan
(untuk masing-masing kategori lomba)
Jangan bimbang,
goyangkan imajinasi dan goreskan tinta inspirasimu.
Lalu kirimkan karya besarmu.
Kami menunggu..
informasi lebih lanjut,
kunjungi website kami
http://fbs2011.co.cc
atau page facebook
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Forum-Bahasa-dan-Sastra-2011/174774575926582
atau kirim e-mail ke fbsma2011@gmail.com
Terima kasih......
Jangan lewatkan kesempatan ini.
CP:
Oviliani W: 08170758948
Alia Nessa: 085716278718
Jumat, 19 Agustus 2011
(Fanfic) Loud and Clear
Ini satu lagi fanfic gue yang gue suka. Tokohnya kali ini adalah Aaron Ramsey, pemain Arsenal favorit gue, dan Vhiolen, tokoh ciptaan gue. Dan kalo boleh agak narsis, sebenernya sih tokoh Vhiolen ini sebagian didasarin dari diri gue sendiri, hehehe. Well, just enjoy it!
Title: Loud and Clear
Author: Mirano Ottawa
Category: Romance, slight angst
Characters: Aaron Ramsey, Vhiolen
Length: hitter
Summary: Aaron was a mute who shut himself away from love. Everything's changed when he met a girl who understood what he really wanted to say.
Disclaimer: I do not own Aaron Ramsey. Neither I do own the song Talking to the Moon, I Swear, and Paint My Love.
Author's Notes: It's alternate universe. Don't kill me, you know I love to torture Aaron.
Blood....? Aaron looked at the small reddish puddle on his palm. His little body trembled as he realized what it was. The only thing he knew about blood was if someone started to cough up blood, then he would die soon. Aaron knew that from a film he accidentally watched a few weeks ago.
Aaron could still hear the sounds of shouting, slamming, and glass breaking from the other room. And since the door was opened, he could also see his father dragged his mother to the corner of the room. He closed his eyes, trying not to look at it, but the voices were still there, penetrating through his skull, imprinted in his brain. Aaron tried to lift his hand to cover her ears, but either because he was going to die or because the dizziness was getting into, he was unable to do so.
He tried to remember what had happened. When his father began to rampage earlier, he threw a beer bottle towards Aaron, and one of the pieces pierced his throat. Aaron hadn’t known it at the time because he could not see his own neck, but he felt pain and the next thing he knew, he began to cough up blood. He wanted to scream to call his mother, but his voice would not come, and besides, his mother was also being tortured by her father.
Aaron coughed again.
And the horrible red spots that pooled on the floor were the last things he saw before he fainted.
Aaron used to be a normal boy. He had a wonderful family, with a mother, a father and an older brother. Their house was quite large and located in a nice neighborhood. He loved to sing – he had pretty good voice – and play football. His life was happy and his family never quarreled with each other. Okay, maybe Josh, his brother, sometimes made fun of him until he cried, but it's just normal sibling fights that never left any wounds.
But things changed since his father lost his job. They had to move to a smaller house in the slums, and lost most of their beautiful items – Aaron remembered when people came to take his box full of toys and he cried, and then his father slapped his head hard. His father got a new job, but the salary was less than his old one, the work itself was harder, and he didn’t like some of his colleagues, so he always threw out his frustrations at home.
Since then, Aaron and his family’s life turned into living hell.
Aaron was no longer allowed to go to the park to play football (he still did it sometimes, but always in secret when his father was at work and his mother let him go). He was no longer allowed to join the choir club (in this case, his mother could not do anything because they no longer had the money to pay the membership). Aaron never got his favorite foods anymore. And every night, when his father came home from work, he hauled everyone on the coals, beat Aaron and Josh, and threw their toys against the wall. Crying didn’t help because it would just make him hit harder.
His mother did her best to protect Aaron and Josh from their father’s wrath – she always reminded them to behave, not making trouble at school, and clean up any mess they accidentally made. But somehow, the father was always able to find a mistake. And if the mother tried to protect her two children, then the father would beat her too.
Finally, the peak occurred on this day.
On the morning, before leaving for school, Josh had asked his mother to go to his friend’s house. His mother allowed, but she said that Josh had to return home before his father came home from work. But it turned out that his father came home early today. And when he did not find Josh in the house, he immediately fumed. His mother had tried to explain that Josh went to his friend's house, but nothing could stop the father.
And now, with a single piece of glass stuck in his throat, Aaron could only be grateful that Josh was not home.
Aaron woke up in a room that he didn’t recognize. The ceiling was white and clean, but the walls were covered in beige floral wallpaper. Green curtains hung on the right side of him. On the other side, he could see a small cabinet, and on the top of the cabinet there were a glass, a pitcher of water, and a basket of fruits. He himself was lying on a bed with white sheet and light brown woolen blanket. His left hand was bandaged, and a pipe stuck out from it. The pipe was connected to the bag containing some clear fluid that hung on the pole beside him.
"Aaron! Honey, you’ve been awake?!"
Aaron turned and saw his mother in the doorway. Her face was pale, there were scratches on her cheek, and her right hand was bandaged, but otherwise she looked fine. Before Aaron could say anything, his mother had walked up and hugged him tightly.
Aaron tried to ask, Where am I? but his voice would not come.
His mother saw it and immediately burst into tears. "Aaron," she whispered hoarsely, "the doctor said a piece of broken glass stabbed your vocal cords. And he said, you could never speak anymore."
Aaron's mind was blank at once. His mother kept talking, telling him that Josh was fine and his father had been imprisoned and she had filed for divorce, but nothing hit Aaron’s mind. He lost his voice. He would no longer be able to talk or sing. He would no longer be able to do many things normal people could do. Although he was still very young, Aaron knew that the chance of bright future for the disables was very thin.
The mother stopped talking when he saw his son's suddenly sullen face. She gently pulled Aaron back into her arms and stroked her hair, while Aaron cried silently in her chest. The mother’s tears soaked into Aaron's hair, and they cried together for a while.
Once Aaron stopped crying, she bent down his bed and took something. When she stood back, Aaron saw his foot ball in her hands.
"I brought you this," his mother said softly. "I thought you’ll need it."
Aaron’s tiny hands reached out and held the ball tightly. Somehow, he felt better once he touched it. He leaned his head into the ball, smelt the typical aroma of the soil as if he was just playing football in the park. And somehow, he knew everything would be fine.
Aaron stepped out of his car. His face was slightly pale and his head bowed, but his paces were quite steady. His right hand gripped an Arsenal jersey with number 16 on the back tightly.
Yes, Aaron was now officially an Arsenal player. His great efforts to train his football skill turned out to fruition. He had played for his local club, Cardiff City, until Arsene Wenger became interested in signing him. Now, Aaron's dream to become a world class footballer seemed closer to reality.
After signing the contract, taking pictures for the press, and blah blah blah, he finally had the opportunity to be introduced to the Arsenal players. Aaron felt both nervous and excited. He was excited knowing that he was able play at Arsenal, one of the best clubs in the world, but he was nervous too, as he didn’t know what would his teammates react later when they found out that he was mute. His former teammates at Cardiff understood his situation, but what if Arsenal players couldn’t accept it? Aaron remembered how Wenger’s eyes nearly jumped out of their sockets on the first time they met each other and Aaron demonstrated sign language in front of him.
Aaron sighed quietly. It's too late to escape now. Upholding the head as much as possible, he stepped into Wenger’s office.
Wenger smiled as he entered the room, and shook his hand. "Welcome to Arsenal, Aaron. We sincerely hope that you'll have good times here.”
Aaron smiled, grabbed a pen and a notebook that he always brought in his pocket, and wrote quickly, "So glad to be here, Monsieur Wenger."
"Come here." Wenger walked ahead of Aaron, going out of his office. "The other kids are all there in the dressing room."
Aaron followed Wenger outside. They walked on they arrived at the dressing room. At first the room was so noisy, but when Wenger and Aaron stepped in, everything went quiet.
"Have all of you already been here?" asked Wenger, looking around.
"No, coach, Robin and Cesc said they had to pick something," said Almunia.
Wenger nodded. "Oh, yeah. I’m the one who told them to pick it up. Okay, we’ll be waiting for a while."
Suddenly the door opened, featuring Robin and Cesc who were carrying a large whiteboard.
"Coach, can you explain to us, what is this for?" Robin asked, putting the board on the floor, panting.
"You'll understand," Wenger said, then turned to Aaron.
Aaron nodded, then he grabbed a marker and approached the whiteboard. He quickly scribbled something on it, making sure the letters were large enough to be read by everyone in the dressing room.
"My name is Aaron James Ramsey, but you can call me Aaron. I'm sorry, I can not introduce myself to you in the normal way, because I'm mute. Do not worry if you want to talk to me, I can use sign language, or if you do not understand it, I'll just write it down. Please do not treat me like a handicap, because I seriously think that I'm as normal as you are. I'm so glad to join Arsenal because I want to be a world-class footballer. I hope all of you can help me to reach my dream. Thanks...."
Finished, Aaron put back the marker’s cap and turned around to face the Arsenal players, slightly challenging look in his eyes.
The Arsenal players stared at the whiteboard, dumbfounded. They never thought about it before. No wonder Aaron did not say anything during the press conference announcing his move to Arsenal! At first they thought that Aaron was just embarrassed, but in fact he could not speak.
Cesc cleared his throat. "You don’t have to worry," he said firmly. "We don’t care whether you’re mute or anything. The important thing is you are an Arsenal player and you'll help us to be champions."
Of course, after that everyone nodded and said yes, they would help. Aaron smiled to all of them, knowing that they were sincere with their words and he was going to have happy days at Arsenal.
Three years passed, and Aaron found his life at Arsenal was enjoyable. On his first days, it still felt a little awkward, because his friends hadn’t been accustomed to see his language sign, or wait for him to finish writing what he wanted to say. But they were all still young and they learned quickly.
They learned to act normally to Aaron and not treat him like a disable. They learned sign language to facilitate their communication with Aaron (Aaron protested this and said he didn’t mind if they talked like usual, but they just responded by saying, "I can’t hear you, Aaron!"). They learned Aaron’s habits in the field because he couldn’t shout their names when he’s going to pass the ball. They also learned to wait, especially when Aaron had to provide long answers and it took some time to write it all down on paper.
Aaron was happy with his life. He could do the job he loved, he had a spacious and comfortable apartment to live in, his friends were very enjoyable and cared for him a lot. There seemed nothing wrong for him – except for one thing. One thing that he had been avoided on his whole life. One thing that was naturally presented within everyone, but he was unable to do so.
He didn’t realize it until one day Robin accidentally mentioned it in the dressing room.
"You do not have any girlfriend, Aaron?" asked Robin while putting on his training jersey.
Aaron gasped. His eyes stared at Robin questioningly. He was so shocked that he couldn’t write nor make any sign language.
Robin saw Aaron's eyes and rolled his. "Don’t be that surprised. I’m just asking you."
Aaron grabbed paper and pen, then wrote, "Who would want to be with me? I'm mute."
"I think you don’t like to be called a disable," said Lukasz, who was sitting next to Aaron and read what he just wrote.
Aaron sighed and wrote again. "That's the problem. Not everyone can understand me. I don’t want the girls to act weirdly to me because I can’t speak. And I also don’t want girls who are willing to accept my disability just because of my money."
"Not all girls are like that, Aaron," Robin tried to convince him. "Bouchra loves me wholeheartedly."
"That's Bouchra. I don’t want to have a girl now."
Robin shrugged. "Whatever you want, Aaron. But let me tell you, humans were created to love each other. You should not disregard it just because you think that you’re a disable."
Aaron didn’t write anymore on the paper, so Robin went to the field first. Once his friend had disappeared behind the door, Aaron took a deep breath.
As he had told Robin before, he really didn’t want to have a girlfriend. Of course, as a normal guy, Aaron could see the beauty of the girls and feel interest in some of them, but he never really fell in love. He honestly told Robin that he deliberately closed his heart because he believed no girls would want him because his disability, but in fact he had another reason.
Indeed, once when he was in high school, Aaron had a crush to a girl from another class and he tried his best to get close to her. One of his friends knew it and managed to arrange a date between them. But when the girl knew that Aaron was mute, she immediately made an excuse and left.
Since then, Aaron shut himself away from love.
---
Title: Loud and Clear
Author: Mirano Ottawa
Category: Romance, slight angst
Characters: Aaron Ramsey, Vhiolen
Length: hitter
Summary: Aaron was a mute who shut himself away from love. Everything's changed when he met a girl who understood what he really wanted to say.
Disclaimer: I do not own Aaron Ramsey. Neither I do own the song Talking to the Moon, I Swear, and Paint My Love.
Author's Notes: It's alternate universe. Don't kill me, you know I love to torture Aaron.
---
Blood....? Aaron looked at the small reddish puddle on his palm. His little body trembled as he realized what it was. The only thing he knew about blood was if someone started to cough up blood, then he would die soon. Aaron knew that from a film he accidentally watched a few weeks ago.
Aaron could still hear the sounds of shouting, slamming, and glass breaking from the other room. And since the door was opened, he could also see his father dragged his mother to the corner of the room. He closed his eyes, trying not to look at it, but the voices were still there, penetrating through his skull, imprinted in his brain. Aaron tried to lift his hand to cover her ears, but either because he was going to die or because the dizziness was getting into, he was unable to do so.
He tried to remember what had happened. When his father began to rampage earlier, he threw a beer bottle towards Aaron, and one of the pieces pierced his throat. Aaron hadn’t known it at the time because he could not see his own neck, but he felt pain and the next thing he knew, he began to cough up blood. He wanted to scream to call his mother, but his voice would not come, and besides, his mother was also being tortured by her father.
Aaron coughed again.
And the horrible red spots that pooled on the floor were the last things he saw before he fainted.
---
Aaron used to be a normal boy. He had a wonderful family, with a mother, a father and an older brother. Their house was quite large and located in a nice neighborhood. He loved to sing – he had pretty good voice – and play football. His life was happy and his family never quarreled with each other. Okay, maybe Josh, his brother, sometimes made fun of him until he cried, but it's just normal sibling fights that never left any wounds.
But things changed since his father lost his job. They had to move to a smaller house in the slums, and lost most of their beautiful items – Aaron remembered when people came to take his box full of toys and he cried, and then his father slapped his head hard. His father got a new job, but the salary was less than his old one, the work itself was harder, and he didn’t like some of his colleagues, so he always threw out his frustrations at home.
Since then, Aaron and his family’s life turned into living hell.
Aaron was no longer allowed to go to the park to play football (he still did it sometimes, but always in secret when his father was at work and his mother let him go). He was no longer allowed to join the choir club (in this case, his mother could not do anything because they no longer had the money to pay the membership). Aaron never got his favorite foods anymore. And every night, when his father came home from work, he hauled everyone on the coals, beat Aaron and Josh, and threw their toys against the wall. Crying didn’t help because it would just make him hit harder.
His mother did her best to protect Aaron and Josh from their father’s wrath – she always reminded them to behave, not making trouble at school, and clean up any mess they accidentally made. But somehow, the father was always able to find a mistake. And if the mother tried to protect her two children, then the father would beat her too.
Finally, the peak occurred on this day.
On the morning, before leaving for school, Josh had asked his mother to go to his friend’s house. His mother allowed, but she said that Josh had to return home before his father came home from work. But it turned out that his father came home early today. And when he did not find Josh in the house, he immediately fumed. His mother had tried to explain that Josh went to his friend's house, but nothing could stop the father.
And now, with a single piece of glass stuck in his throat, Aaron could only be grateful that Josh was not home.
---
Aaron woke up in a room that he didn’t recognize. The ceiling was white and clean, but the walls were covered in beige floral wallpaper. Green curtains hung on the right side of him. On the other side, he could see a small cabinet, and on the top of the cabinet there were a glass, a pitcher of water, and a basket of fruits. He himself was lying on a bed with white sheet and light brown woolen blanket. His left hand was bandaged, and a pipe stuck out from it. The pipe was connected to the bag containing some clear fluid that hung on the pole beside him.
"Aaron! Honey, you’ve been awake?!"
Aaron turned and saw his mother in the doorway. Her face was pale, there were scratches on her cheek, and her right hand was bandaged, but otherwise she looked fine. Before Aaron could say anything, his mother had walked up and hugged him tightly.
Aaron tried to ask, Where am I? but his voice would not come.
His mother saw it and immediately burst into tears. "Aaron," she whispered hoarsely, "the doctor said a piece of broken glass stabbed your vocal cords. And he said, you could never speak anymore."
Aaron's mind was blank at once. His mother kept talking, telling him that Josh was fine and his father had been imprisoned and she had filed for divorce, but nothing hit Aaron’s mind. He lost his voice. He would no longer be able to talk or sing. He would no longer be able to do many things normal people could do. Although he was still very young, Aaron knew that the chance of bright future for the disables was very thin.
The mother stopped talking when he saw his son's suddenly sullen face. She gently pulled Aaron back into her arms and stroked her hair, while Aaron cried silently in her chest. The mother’s tears soaked into Aaron's hair, and they cried together for a while.
Once Aaron stopped crying, she bent down his bed and took something. When she stood back, Aaron saw his foot ball in her hands.
"I brought you this," his mother said softly. "I thought you’ll need it."
Aaron’s tiny hands reached out and held the ball tightly. Somehow, he felt better once he touched it. He leaned his head into the ball, smelt the typical aroma of the soil as if he was just playing football in the park. And somehow, he knew everything would be fine.
---
Aaron stepped out of his car. His face was slightly pale and his head bowed, but his paces were quite steady. His right hand gripped an Arsenal jersey with number 16 on the back tightly.
Yes, Aaron was now officially an Arsenal player. His great efforts to train his football skill turned out to fruition. He had played for his local club, Cardiff City, until Arsene Wenger became interested in signing him. Now, Aaron's dream to become a world class footballer seemed closer to reality.
After signing the contract, taking pictures for the press, and blah blah blah, he finally had the opportunity to be introduced to the Arsenal players. Aaron felt both nervous and excited. He was excited knowing that he was able play at Arsenal, one of the best clubs in the world, but he was nervous too, as he didn’t know what would his teammates react later when they found out that he was mute. His former teammates at Cardiff understood his situation, but what if Arsenal players couldn’t accept it? Aaron remembered how Wenger’s eyes nearly jumped out of their sockets on the first time they met each other and Aaron demonstrated sign language in front of him.
Aaron sighed quietly. It's too late to escape now. Upholding the head as much as possible, he stepped into Wenger’s office.
Wenger smiled as he entered the room, and shook his hand. "Welcome to Arsenal, Aaron. We sincerely hope that you'll have good times here.”
Aaron smiled, grabbed a pen and a notebook that he always brought in his pocket, and wrote quickly, "So glad to be here, Monsieur Wenger."
"Come here." Wenger walked ahead of Aaron, going out of his office. "The other kids are all there in the dressing room."
Aaron followed Wenger outside. They walked on they arrived at the dressing room. At first the room was so noisy, but when Wenger and Aaron stepped in, everything went quiet.
"Have all of you already been here?" asked Wenger, looking around.
"No, coach, Robin and Cesc said they had to pick something," said Almunia.
Wenger nodded. "Oh, yeah. I’m the one who told them to pick it up. Okay, we’ll be waiting for a while."
Suddenly the door opened, featuring Robin and Cesc who were carrying a large whiteboard.
"Coach, can you explain to us, what is this for?" Robin asked, putting the board on the floor, panting.
"You'll understand," Wenger said, then turned to Aaron.
Aaron nodded, then he grabbed a marker and approached the whiteboard. He quickly scribbled something on it, making sure the letters were large enough to be read by everyone in the dressing room.
"My name is Aaron James Ramsey, but you can call me Aaron. I'm sorry, I can not introduce myself to you in the normal way, because I'm mute. Do not worry if you want to talk to me, I can use sign language, or if you do not understand it, I'll just write it down. Please do not treat me like a handicap, because I seriously think that I'm as normal as you are. I'm so glad to join Arsenal because I want to be a world-class footballer. I hope all of you can help me to reach my dream. Thanks...."
Finished, Aaron put back the marker’s cap and turned around to face the Arsenal players, slightly challenging look in his eyes.
The Arsenal players stared at the whiteboard, dumbfounded. They never thought about it before. No wonder Aaron did not say anything during the press conference announcing his move to Arsenal! At first they thought that Aaron was just embarrassed, but in fact he could not speak.
Cesc cleared his throat. "You don’t have to worry," he said firmly. "We don’t care whether you’re mute or anything. The important thing is you are an Arsenal player and you'll help us to be champions."
Of course, after that everyone nodded and said yes, they would help. Aaron smiled to all of them, knowing that they were sincere with their words and he was going to have happy days at Arsenal.
---
Three years passed, and Aaron found his life at Arsenal was enjoyable. On his first days, it still felt a little awkward, because his friends hadn’t been accustomed to see his language sign, or wait for him to finish writing what he wanted to say. But they were all still young and they learned quickly.
They learned to act normally to Aaron and not treat him like a disable. They learned sign language to facilitate their communication with Aaron (Aaron protested this and said he didn’t mind if they talked like usual, but they just responded by saying, "I can’t hear you, Aaron!"). They learned Aaron’s habits in the field because he couldn’t shout their names when he’s going to pass the ball. They also learned to wait, especially when Aaron had to provide long answers and it took some time to write it all down on paper.
Aaron was happy with his life. He could do the job he loved, he had a spacious and comfortable apartment to live in, his friends were very enjoyable and cared for him a lot. There seemed nothing wrong for him – except for one thing. One thing that he had been avoided on his whole life. One thing that was naturally presented within everyone, but he was unable to do so.
He didn’t realize it until one day Robin accidentally mentioned it in the dressing room.
"You do not have any girlfriend, Aaron?" asked Robin while putting on his training jersey.
Aaron gasped. His eyes stared at Robin questioningly. He was so shocked that he couldn’t write nor make any sign language.
Robin saw Aaron's eyes and rolled his. "Don’t be that surprised. I’m just asking you."
Aaron grabbed paper and pen, then wrote, "Who would want to be with me? I'm mute."
"I think you don’t like to be called a disable," said Lukasz, who was sitting next to Aaron and read what he just wrote.
Aaron sighed and wrote again. "That's the problem. Not everyone can understand me. I don’t want the girls to act weirdly to me because I can’t speak. And I also don’t want girls who are willing to accept my disability just because of my money."
"Not all girls are like that, Aaron," Robin tried to convince him. "Bouchra loves me wholeheartedly."
"That's Bouchra. I don’t want to have a girl now."
Robin shrugged. "Whatever you want, Aaron. But let me tell you, humans were created to love each other. You should not disregard it just because you think that you’re a disable."
Aaron didn’t write anymore on the paper, so Robin went to the field first. Once his friend had disappeared behind the door, Aaron took a deep breath.
As he had told Robin before, he really didn’t want to have a girlfriend. Of course, as a normal guy, Aaron could see the beauty of the girls and feel interest in some of them, but he never really fell in love. He honestly told Robin that he deliberately closed his heart because he believed no girls would want him because his disability, but in fact he had another reason.
Aaron couldn’t forget his childhood, especially when his father threw beer bottle at him and make him lose his voice. Although since then Aaron had never met or even heard from his father, the incident was still fresh in his mind and made him traumatized. He once loved and admired his father sincerely, but the same person was the one who had wounded him. Aaron did not want to have himself hurt again, both physically and mentally, especially by his loved ones.
Indeed, once when he was in high school, Aaron had a crush to a girl from another class and he tried his best to get close to her. One of his friends knew it and managed to arrange a date between them. But when the girl knew that Aaron was mute, she immediately made an excuse and left.
Since then, Aaron shut himself away from love.
---
Aaron didn’t really like it when Arsenal players went to a night club and then they decided to do karaoke. Although he did enjoy listening to music and laughing at his friends who tried to mimic some famous singers’ style, but he himself wasn’t able to fully enjoy it because he couldn’t sing along. So, Aaron often went home first if they started a karaoke night.
But today, Aaron’s car was damaged and he had to take it to be repaired. And when the Arsenal players asked him to go to a club that night, he went with Bendtner. And of course, there was no way Bendtner would want to go home first when they started to do karaoke. Aaron had no choice but stayed and listened to his friends singing.
While they all gathered and watched Sagna trying to sing the song Thriller, mimicking Michael Jackson’s style, Aaron looked around the club, trying not to look so miserable. In fact, he felt a little hurt. He remembered how he used to love singing, and how people told him he had pretty good voice. If only he still had his voice, he would be happy to join his friends for karaoke, but now....
Aaron shook his head and looked away from Sagna to eliminate that thought. At that moment, he caught the view of of a girl who was sitting not too far from him, surrounded by her friends.
The girl had long, black, straight hair, parted in the middle and decorated with a pair of tiny hairpins. He wore a short white jacket over an orange tanktop and skinny blue jeans. Her feet were wrapped in a pair of orange high wedge shoes. When her gaze accidentally met Aaron’s eyes, he discovered that the girl has a pair of dark eyes, the darkest ones he had ever seen. Her face was not too round but not too elliptical either. Her eyebrows were thick, her nose was rather large, and her lips were too thin, but when she smiled, her dimples emerged and every man would admit that it made her looked so cute.
Aaron smiled back, but quickly looked away. He should not be enamored of the girl, he reminded himself. She was just an ordinary girl whom he met at this night club, that’s all. Aaron forced himself to look at Sagna until he finished singing.
At that point, there was a slight commotion at the next table. Aaron turned around and saw the girl was driven onto the stage by her friends.
"No, I do not want to! I can not sing!" the girl exclaimed.
But her friends persisted, and suddenly she's already on the stage. With her face a little flushed with embarrassment, she told the DJ what song would be sung by her.
Moments later, a gentle, sweet melody floated from the speakers and the girl began to sing.
I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away
I want you back
I want you back
My neighbors think I'm crazy
But they don’t understand
You're all I had
You're all I had
As the girl had said before, her voice wasn’t very good, even Aaron could say that it was a little discordant. But Aaron was interested in her expression when she was singing the song – so mellow and full of appreciation, her eyes glazed slightly as if trying to find someone whom she did not know where.
At night when the stars light up my room
I sit by myself
Talking to the moon
Trying to get to you
In hope you're on the other side
Talking to me too
Or I'm a fool who sits alone
Talking to the moon
The girl walked away until she was a few steps in front of Aaron.
I'm feeling like I'm famous
The talk of the town
They say I've gone mad
Yeah I've gone mad
But they don’t know what I know
Cause when the sun goes down
Someone's talking back
Yeah they're talking back
At night when the stars light up my room
I sit by myself
Talking to the moon
Trying to get to you
In hope you're on the other side
Talking to me too
Or I'm a fool who sits alone
Talking to the moon
The girl took a few steps forward, now she was right in front of Aaron.
Do you ever hear me calling?
Cause every night I'm talking to the moon
Still trying to get to you
In hope you're on the other side
Talking to me too
Or I'm a fool who sits alone
Talking to the moon
She prepared to end her song, and Aaron was amazed to see a single tear rolling down her cheek.
I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away....
Once the music stopped, polite applause filled the room. Aaron understood, the quality of the girl’s voice wasn’t very good. But he clapped loudly. He could see that the girl sang the song with all her heart, and he appreciated it.
Aaron waited until all the girl's friends left the table to the dance floor. Somehow, he knew that the girl was not the type who liked disco. Quietly, he went away from his friends, then approached her after ordering a drink from the waitress.
The girl turned around and smiled at Aaron. "Hi....”
Aaron made the gesture "Hi" with his hands, half waiting for the girls’ eyes to widen and then she would make excuses to go, but the girl didn’t do it. Instead, she didn’t seem surprised at all. She only pulled up a chair next to her and gestured at Aaron to sit there.
Aaron sat on the chair, though he still felt little amazed. How could the girl not surprised to see him using sign language? Aaron never told tell the press that he was....
"I know you're mute," the girl said with a chuckle.
Aaron's eyes widened in surprise.
"How could I know?" She smiled again, this time both of her dark eyes were gleaming like a pair of stars. "I have sixth sense. I can read your mind."
Aaron gasped, half because he was shocked to hear what the girl had just said, the other half because he didn’t know why the girl had to tell him that.
"It was nothing important," the girl said. "All of my friends know it."
But.... Aaron thought.
"It’s easier to talk to you this way, right?" The girl laughed again. "You don’t need to write or use sign language."
Aaron looked at the girl in amazement again.
"By the way, my name’s Vhiolen," the girl said softly, her dark eyes penetrating Aaron’s brown ones, and Aaron melted a little bit inside.
That was the smoothest conversation he ever had since he became a mute.
Vhiolen and Aaron quickly became good friends, although in a rather peculiar way. They talked almost every day, because Vhiolen could hear Aaron’s thoughts no matter how far the girl from him. And Vhiolen was always ready whenever Aaron wanted to talk.
If they were seeing each other, Aaron insisted that Vhiolen had to speak with her own voice. Not that Aaron didn’t like Vhiolen to enter his mind, but somehow he was pleased to hear her voice. Listening to her laugh, and seeing her sweet dimples.
One day, Aaron visited Vhiolen's apartment and was surprised to learn that she's good at playing a piano.
Play me something while singing it, Aaron pleaded.
"My voice is bad, Aaron."
I don’t care. I want to hear you sing.
Vhiolen paused for quite a long time, his fingers lingering on the piano keys gently. For a moment Aaron thought the girl would refuse, but then she slowly started to hit the keys and sang.
I swear
By the moon and the stars and the skies
I'll be there
I swear
Like a shadow that's by your side
I see the questions in your eyes
I know what's weighing on your mind
You can be sure I know my part
Cause I stand beside you through the years
You'll only cry those happy tears
And though I made mistakes
I'll never break your heart
And I swear
By the moon and the stars and the skies
I'll be there
Oh, I swear
Like a shadow that's by your side
For better or worse til death do us part
I'll love you with every beat of my heart
Oh, I swear
I'll give you everything I can
I'll build your dreams with these two hands
We'll hang some memories on the walls
And when just the two of us are there
You won’t have to ask if I still care
Cause as the time turns the page
My love won’t age at all
And I swear
By the moon and the stars and the skies
I'll be there
Oh, I swear
Like a shadow that's by your side
For better or worse til death do us part
I'll love you with every beat of my heart
Oh, I swear
Vhiolen finished the song. Like before, her voice was rather discordant and sometimes she sang out of tune, but Aaron did not care. He reached out and squeezed Vhiolen’s shoulder gently. Your performance is really good.
Vhiolen laughed softly. "Don’t say that just to make me happy, Aaron. I know I can’t sing."
Aaron sighed. If I still have my voice, I'll sing for you. I used to have good voice.
"I know," Vhiolen smiled, stroking Aaron’s cheek. "But you can’t, Aaron. Accept it. "
Aaron bit his lower lip.
"How’s your relationship with Vhiolen, Aaron?" Jack asked, grinning.
Aaron frowned to his teammate.
"Don’t act like you don’t know anything, Aaron. Everyone can see it. "
"Vhiolen and I are just friends," Aaron wrote.
Jack smirked. "Yeah, yeah. But you've got a feeling to her, right?"
"I do not want to fall in love, Jack."
"I'm sure she can accept your condition."
Aaron's hand trembled as he wrote again. "You don’t understand my feelings. I don’t want to be hurt by the one I love, Jack. I’ve lost my voice, I don’t need to lose anymore part of me."
Jack stared at Aaron. "You don’t think that Vhiolen would have a heart to hurt you, do you?"
Aaron did not answer.
"You're so stupid, Aaron," Jack said quietly, shaking his head as he walked away.
I want you to be an ENT specialist, said Aaron one day to Vhiolen.
"Why?" Vhiolen asked, raising her head from the book about human respiratory system she was reading (she was a med student, by the way).
So that you’ll be able to give my voice back.
"Why are you so obsessed to be able to speak again, Aaron?" Vhiolen whispered, looking straight into his eyes. "All this time, you never mind that. You’re still able to play football and...."
I want to talk to you, Vhiolen. I want to sing for you. I want you to hear my own voice....
"But I can hear it," Vhiolen said softly. “Loud and clear.”
It’s just my thought, not my real voice.
"Aaron, why do you really care about that? Am I really that important in your life?"
Aaron blinked.
"You told your teammates that I was only your friend. That means that you don’t see me as something more than them, right? Then why are you so determined to talk for me?"
Vhiolen’s voice remained calm, but there was something in her eyes that made Aaron looked downside and did not dare to say anything else.
"I never mean to make you sad, Aaron." Vhiolen's voice faded. "I just want to know why."
Aaron could not answer.
"Try to think about that, okay?" Vhiolen suggested. "I'm going to talk again to you only if you have already know why."
Aaron could only nod, trying not to show that when he heard Vhiolen’s last sentence, something in his heart cracked.
"I think you're a fool," said Jack, looking at Aaron sharply.
Aaron did not answer.
"She loves you, and you love her. How can’t you see it? "
Aaron shook his head miserably, hoping it could make Jack go away. At that time, he did not have enough strength to even take a pen and paper.
Jack looked at Aaron, then reached into his pocket and pulled out something, which he dropped on Aaron’s lap. Aaron looked at it. It was an advertisement that clearly was cut from the newspaper. And it was about the surgery to repair vocal cords.
"Maybe it could help you," Jack said. "And maybe not."
Aaron looked at him with the expression of gratitude.
Jack smiled slightly and walked away.
Aaron looked downside again, staring at the ads in his hand. Then he jumped up and got into his car. Less than half an hour later, he was sitting in a waiting room of a hospital, waiting to be called by the doctor.
In his mind, Aaron kept thinking about Vhiolen. It is the time, he told himself. I will gain my voice back, and I will make her happy. He closed his eyes, trying to picture himself singing something to Vhiolen with his newly-improved voice while she played the piano. That would be good....
Yet somehow, his mind couldn’t focus on that image. Instead, he thought about other things. How Jack called him an idiot, how Vhiolen sang while playing the piano for him, how Vhiolen said he could hear Aaron although he couldn’t speak, how the girl's eyes looked like as she urged Aaron to tell her why Aaron wanted his voice so bad. Vhiolen, Vhiolen, Vhiolen. The thoughts of the girl filled his mind, making his heart beat faster. Yes, Aaron knew now that he loved the girl.
If his voice was restored, the girl would love him more, right?
But what if she doesn’t want it? She loves you the way you are. His conscience whispered to him, over and over again in his heart.
Aaron closed his eyes, trying to still the voice. However, being a conscience, the more he tried to mute it, the louder it sounded.
He was snapped back to the real world by a voice calling his name. "Aaron Ramsey."
Aaron opened his eyes and saw the doctor's room door was opened. A nurse stood in front of the door, beckoning at him to enter the room. Within minutes, he would have a consultation with the doctor, and he would have a small operation to restore his voice....
Aaron gritted his teeth. He had taken his decision.
Vhiolen was sitting dreamily at her apartment when the bell rang. Without much thinking, the girl jumped up and opened the door. And at the front door, there stood a guy with short brown hair and greenish brown eyes.
The girl blinked. “Aaron?”
Vhiolen, Aaron whispered through his mind. May I come in?
Vhiolen’s eyes widened. "You didn’t take the operation?"
Aaron didn’t answer.
“I thought you really wanted your voice back, so...." Vhiolen’s voice faded.
Aaron raised an eyebrow. So, Vhiolen was the one who gave the ad to Jack to be handed to him! Aaron smiled and reached out to hug the girl. I don’t care about that, Vhiolen. I was being stupid. But I realize now, you can hear me, loud and clear, though I am mute. And you love me just the way I am.
"I love you," Vhiolen repeated, unconsciously gripping Aaron’s shirt tightly.
I love you too, Aaron said sincerely.
Vhiolen’s bright smile widened, revealing her adorable dimples. She buried her face in Aaron’s chest, enjoying the warmth emanated from his body. Aaron stroked her hair, feeling the joy bubbled inside him because he finally found his true love.
"Will you do me a favor?" Vhiolen whispered.
What is that?
"Sing for me."
Aaron frowned. You know I can’t sing.
"I want to hear the song of your heart," Vhiolen said softly, placing her hands on Aaron's chest.
Aaron nodded and mouthed the first song coming to his mind.
From my youngest years til this moment here
I’ve never seen such a lovely queen
From the skies above to the deepest love
I’ve never felt crazy like this before
Paint my love, you should paint my love
It’s the picture of thousand sunsets
It’s the freedom of a thousand doves
Baby you should paint my love
Been around the world then I met you girl
It’s like coming home to a place I’ve known
Paint my love, you should paint my love
It’s the picture of thousand sunsets
It’s the freedom of a thousand doves
Baby you should paint my love
Since you came into my life
The days before are fade to black and white
Since you came into my life
Everything has changed
Paint my love, you should paint my love
It’s the picture of thousand sunsets
It’s the freedom of a thousand doves
Baby you should paint my love
Vhiolen looked at Aaron, happy tears streaming down her cheeks. Aaron smiled and leaned closer to kiss her lips, knowing that the voiceless, tuneless song had started everything between them.
But today, Aaron’s car was damaged and he had to take it to be repaired. And when the Arsenal players asked him to go to a club that night, he went with Bendtner. And of course, there was no way Bendtner would want to go home first when they started to do karaoke. Aaron had no choice but stayed and listened to his friends singing.
While they all gathered and watched Sagna trying to sing the song Thriller, mimicking Michael Jackson’s style, Aaron looked around the club, trying not to look so miserable. In fact, he felt a little hurt. He remembered how he used to love singing, and how people told him he had pretty good voice. If only he still had his voice, he would be happy to join his friends for karaoke, but now....
Aaron shook his head and looked away from Sagna to eliminate that thought. At that moment, he caught the view of of a girl who was sitting not too far from him, surrounded by her friends.
The girl had long, black, straight hair, parted in the middle and decorated with a pair of tiny hairpins. He wore a short white jacket over an orange tanktop and skinny blue jeans. Her feet were wrapped in a pair of orange high wedge shoes. When her gaze accidentally met Aaron’s eyes, he discovered that the girl has a pair of dark eyes, the darkest ones he had ever seen. Her face was not too round but not too elliptical either. Her eyebrows were thick, her nose was rather large, and her lips were too thin, but when she smiled, her dimples emerged and every man would admit that it made her looked so cute.
Aaron smiled back, but quickly looked away. He should not be enamored of the girl, he reminded himself. She was just an ordinary girl whom he met at this night club, that’s all. Aaron forced himself to look at Sagna until he finished singing.
At that point, there was a slight commotion at the next table. Aaron turned around and saw the girl was driven onto the stage by her friends.
"No, I do not want to! I can not sing!" the girl exclaimed.
But her friends persisted, and suddenly she's already on the stage. With her face a little flushed with embarrassment, she told the DJ what song would be sung by her.
Moments later, a gentle, sweet melody floated from the speakers and the girl began to sing.
I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away
I want you back
I want you back
My neighbors think I'm crazy
But they don’t understand
You're all I had
You're all I had
As the girl had said before, her voice wasn’t very good, even Aaron could say that it was a little discordant. But Aaron was interested in her expression when she was singing the song – so mellow and full of appreciation, her eyes glazed slightly as if trying to find someone whom she did not know where.
At night when the stars light up my room
I sit by myself
Talking to the moon
Trying to get to you
In hope you're on the other side
Talking to me too
Or I'm a fool who sits alone
Talking to the moon
The girl walked away until she was a few steps in front of Aaron.
I'm feeling like I'm famous
The talk of the town
They say I've gone mad
Yeah I've gone mad
But they don’t know what I know
Cause when the sun goes down
Someone's talking back
Yeah they're talking back
At night when the stars light up my room
I sit by myself
Talking to the moon
Trying to get to you
In hope you're on the other side
Talking to me too
Or I'm a fool who sits alone
Talking to the moon
The girl took a few steps forward, now she was right in front of Aaron.
Do you ever hear me calling?
Cause every night I'm talking to the moon
Still trying to get to you
In hope you're on the other side
Talking to me too
Or I'm a fool who sits alone
Talking to the moon
She prepared to end her song, and Aaron was amazed to see a single tear rolling down her cheek.
I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away....
Once the music stopped, polite applause filled the room. Aaron understood, the quality of the girl’s voice wasn’t very good. But he clapped loudly. He could see that the girl sang the song with all her heart, and he appreciated it.
Aaron waited until all the girl's friends left the table to the dance floor. Somehow, he knew that the girl was not the type who liked disco. Quietly, he went away from his friends, then approached her after ordering a drink from the waitress.
The girl turned around and smiled at Aaron. "Hi....”
Aaron made the gesture "Hi" with his hands, half waiting for the girls’ eyes to widen and then she would make excuses to go, but the girl didn’t do it. Instead, she didn’t seem surprised at all. She only pulled up a chair next to her and gestured at Aaron to sit there.
Aaron sat on the chair, though he still felt little amazed. How could the girl not surprised to see him using sign language? Aaron never told tell the press that he was....
"I know you're mute," the girl said with a chuckle.
Aaron's eyes widened in surprise.
"How could I know?" She smiled again, this time both of her dark eyes were gleaming like a pair of stars. "I have sixth sense. I can read your mind."
Aaron gasped, half because he was shocked to hear what the girl had just said, the other half because he didn’t know why the girl had to tell him that.
"It was nothing important," the girl said. "All of my friends know it."
But.... Aaron thought.
"It’s easier to talk to you this way, right?" The girl laughed again. "You don’t need to write or use sign language."
Aaron looked at the girl in amazement again.
"By the way, my name’s Vhiolen," the girl said softly, her dark eyes penetrating Aaron’s brown ones, and Aaron melted a little bit inside.
That was the smoothest conversation he ever had since he became a mute.
---
Vhiolen and Aaron quickly became good friends, although in a rather peculiar way. They talked almost every day, because Vhiolen could hear Aaron’s thoughts no matter how far the girl from him. And Vhiolen was always ready whenever Aaron wanted to talk.
If they were seeing each other, Aaron insisted that Vhiolen had to speak with her own voice. Not that Aaron didn’t like Vhiolen to enter his mind, but somehow he was pleased to hear her voice. Listening to her laugh, and seeing her sweet dimples.
One day, Aaron visited Vhiolen's apartment and was surprised to learn that she's good at playing a piano.
Play me something while singing it, Aaron pleaded.
"My voice is bad, Aaron."
I don’t care. I want to hear you sing.
Vhiolen paused for quite a long time, his fingers lingering on the piano keys gently. For a moment Aaron thought the girl would refuse, but then she slowly started to hit the keys and sang.
I swear
By the moon and the stars and the skies
I'll be there
I swear
Like a shadow that's by your side
I see the questions in your eyes
I know what's weighing on your mind
You can be sure I know my part
Cause I stand beside you through the years
You'll only cry those happy tears
And though I made mistakes
I'll never break your heart
And I swear
By the moon and the stars and the skies
I'll be there
Oh, I swear
Like a shadow that's by your side
For better or worse til death do us part
I'll love you with every beat of my heart
Oh, I swear
I'll give you everything I can
I'll build your dreams with these two hands
We'll hang some memories on the walls
And when just the two of us are there
You won’t have to ask if I still care
Cause as the time turns the page
My love won’t age at all
And I swear
By the moon and the stars and the skies
I'll be there
Oh, I swear
Like a shadow that's by your side
For better or worse til death do us part
I'll love you with every beat of my heart
Oh, I swear
Vhiolen finished the song. Like before, her voice was rather discordant and sometimes she sang out of tune, but Aaron did not care. He reached out and squeezed Vhiolen’s shoulder gently. Your performance is really good.
Vhiolen laughed softly. "Don’t say that just to make me happy, Aaron. I know I can’t sing."
Aaron sighed. If I still have my voice, I'll sing for you. I used to have good voice.
"I know," Vhiolen smiled, stroking Aaron’s cheek. "But you can’t, Aaron. Accept it. "
Aaron bit his lower lip.
---
"How’s your relationship with Vhiolen, Aaron?" Jack asked, grinning.
Aaron frowned to his teammate.
"Don’t act like you don’t know anything, Aaron. Everyone can see it. "
"Vhiolen and I are just friends," Aaron wrote.
Jack smirked. "Yeah, yeah. But you've got a feeling to her, right?"
"I do not want to fall in love, Jack."
"I'm sure she can accept your condition."
Aaron's hand trembled as he wrote again. "You don’t understand my feelings. I don’t want to be hurt by the one I love, Jack. I’ve lost my voice, I don’t need to lose anymore part of me."
Jack stared at Aaron. "You don’t think that Vhiolen would have a heart to hurt you, do you?"
Aaron did not answer.
"You're so stupid, Aaron," Jack said quietly, shaking his head as he walked away.
---
I want you to be an ENT specialist, said Aaron one day to Vhiolen.
"Why?" Vhiolen asked, raising her head from the book about human respiratory system she was reading (she was a med student, by the way).
So that you’ll be able to give my voice back.
"Why are you so obsessed to be able to speak again, Aaron?" Vhiolen whispered, looking straight into his eyes. "All this time, you never mind that. You’re still able to play football and...."
I want to talk to you, Vhiolen. I want to sing for you. I want you to hear my own voice....
"But I can hear it," Vhiolen said softly. “Loud and clear.”
It’s just my thought, not my real voice.
"Aaron, why do you really care about that? Am I really that important in your life?"
Aaron blinked.
"You told your teammates that I was only your friend. That means that you don’t see me as something more than them, right? Then why are you so determined to talk for me?"
Vhiolen’s voice remained calm, but there was something in her eyes that made Aaron looked downside and did not dare to say anything else.
"I never mean to make you sad, Aaron." Vhiolen's voice faded. "I just want to know why."
Aaron could not answer.
"Try to think about that, okay?" Vhiolen suggested. "I'm going to talk again to you only if you have already know why."
Aaron could only nod, trying not to show that when he heard Vhiolen’s last sentence, something in his heart cracked.
---
"I think you're a fool," said Jack, looking at Aaron sharply.
Aaron did not answer.
"She loves you, and you love her. How can’t you see it? "
Aaron shook his head miserably, hoping it could make Jack go away. At that time, he did not have enough strength to even take a pen and paper.
Jack looked at Aaron, then reached into his pocket and pulled out something, which he dropped on Aaron’s lap. Aaron looked at it. It was an advertisement that clearly was cut from the newspaper. And it was about the surgery to repair vocal cords.
"Maybe it could help you," Jack said. "And maybe not."
Aaron looked at him with the expression of gratitude.
Jack smiled slightly and walked away.
Aaron looked downside again, staring at the ads in his hand. Then he jumped up and got into his car. Less than half an hour later, he was sitting in a waiting room of a hospital, waiting to be called by the doctor.
In his mind, Aaron kept thinking about Vhiolen. It is the time, he told himself. I will gain my voice back, and I will make her happy. He closed his eyes, trying to picture himself singing something to Vhiolen with his newly-improved voice while she played the piano. That would be good....
Yet somehow, his mind couldn’t focus on that image. Instead, he thought about other things. How Jack called him an idiot, how Vhiolen sang while playing the piano for him, how Vhiolen said he could hear Aaron although he couldn’t speak, how the girl's eyes looked like as she urged Aaron to tell her why Aaron wanted his voice so bad. Vhiolen, Vhiolen, Vhiolen. The thoughts of the girl filled his mind, making his heart beat faster. Yes, Aaron knew now that he loved the girl.
If his voice was restored, the girl would love him more, right?
But what if she doesn’t want it? She loves you the way you are. His conscience whispered to him, over and over again in his heart.
Aaron closed his eyes, trying to still the voice. However, being a conscience, the more he tried to mute it, the louder it sounded.
He was snapped back to the real world by a voice calling his name. "Aaron Ramsey."
Aaron opened his eyes and saw the doctor's room door was opened. A nurse stood in front of the door, beckoning at him to enter the room. Within minutes, he would have a consultation with the doctor, and he would have a small operation to restore his voice....
Aaron gritted his teeth. He had taken his decision.
---
Vhiolen was sitting dreamily at her apartment when the bell rang. Without much thinking, the girl jumped up and opened the door. And at the front door, there stood a guy with short brown hair and greenish brown eyes.
The girl blinked. “Aaron?”
Vhiolen, Aaron whispered through his mind. May I come in?
Vhiolen’s eyes widened. "You didn’t take the operation?"
Aaron didn’t answer.
“I thought you really wanted your voice back, so...." Vhiolen’s voice faded.
Aaron raised an eyebrow. So, Vhiolen was the one who gave the ad to Jack to be handed to him! Aaron smiled and reached out to hug the girl. I don’t care about that, Vhiolen. I was being stupid. But I realize now, you can hear me, loud and clear, though I am mute. And you love me just the way I am.
"I love you," Vhiolen repeated, unconsciously gripping Aaron’s shirt tightly.
I love you too, Aaron said sincerely.
Vhiolen’s bright smile widened, revealing her adorable dimples. She buried her face in Aaron’s chest, enjoying the warmth emanated from his body. Aaron stroked her hair, feeling the joy bubbled inside him because he finally found his true love.
"Will you do me a favor?" Vhiolen whispered.
What is that?
"Sing for me."
Aaron frowned. You know I can’t sing.
"I want to hear the song of your heart," Vhiolen said softly, placing her hands on Aaron's chest.
Aaron nodded and mouthed the first song coming to his mind.
From my youngest years til this moment here
I’ve never seen such a lovely queen
From the skies above to the deepest love
I’ve never felt crazy like this before
Paint my love, you should paint my love
It’s the picture of thousand sunsets
It’s the freedom of a thousand doves
Baby you should paint my love
Been around the world then I met you girl
It’s like coming home to a place I’ve known
Paint my love, you should paint my love
It’s the picture of thousand sunsets
It’s the freedom of a thousand doves
Baby you should paint my love
Since you came into my life
The days before are fade to black and white
Since you came into my life
Everything has changed
Paint my love, you should paint my love
It’s the picture of thousand sunsets
It’s the freedom of a thousand doves
Baby you should paint my love
Vhiolen looked at Aaron, happy tears streaming down her cheeks. Aaron smiled and leaned closer to kiss her lips, knowing that the voiceless, tuneless song had started everything between them.
***
Kamis, 04 Agustus 2011
Syiar, Medikasi, Whatever. I Love FSI!
Kalau dipikir-pikir, sekarang sudah setahun lebih saya menjadi anggota Forum Studi Islam (FSI).
Mulanya, tidak ada niatan saya untuk memasuki organisasi ini. Oh, tentu saja saya tahu dan simpati pada FSI (hello, I'm a muslimah!) tapi saya tidak terlalu berminat memasukinya. Di mata saya, para anggota FSI ibarat bidadari-bidadari dengan jilbab lebar, rok panjang, dan baju longgarnya. Sedangkan saya, yang saat itu masih berstatus maba, cukup nyaman dengan blus berlengan pendek, rok selutut, dan rambut diurai. Bagaimana mungkin saya menjadi anggota FSI?
Singkat kata, setelah melalui proses mabim (masa bimbingan) yang cukup melelahkan, kami dipersilakan untuk mendaftar badan. Saat itu, pikiran saya langsung tertuju pada tiga badan yang saya minati: Media Aesculapius (MA), Badan Film Mahasiswa (BFM), dan Tim Bantuan Medis (TBM). Saya mengambil tiga formulir dan sudah mengisi dua formulir pertama dengan MA dan BFM ketika kata-kata dari teman saya mendadak membuyarkan impian saya.
"Ta....di TBM ada lat-fis (latihan fisik) lho."
Oh, tidak. Latihan fisik?! Itu adalah satu hal yang sangat saya benci. Oke, saya tahu ini tidak baik untuk kesehatan saya, tapi saya sangat benci olahraga. Dan saya tahu kalaupun saya nekat, saya takkan mampu menjalaninya. Maka saya mengurungkan niat mendaftar TBM.
Saya memutar otak kembali. Saya harus mendaftar badan apa kalau begitu? Tidak ada badan lain yang benar-benar saya minati. Mungkin saya sempat terpikir Senat, namun entah kenapa sesuatu memberitahu saya untuk tidak mendaftar Senat. Saya pun mencoba mengingatkan diri, apa yang saya inginkan untuk saya capai di kehidupan berorganisasi? Menulis, sudah saya usahakan dengan mendaftar MA. Perfilman, saya mendaftar BFM. Lalu apa lagi?
Mendadak saya teringat keinginan saya saat itu, yang saya rasa saya belum cukup mantap untuk mewujudkannya: memakai jilbab. Dan saya pun sampai pada satu kesimpulan, kalau saya mau memantapkan niat, tidak ada tempat yang lebih baik untuk mendukung saya selain FSI. Ya, FSI. Maka tanpa pikir panjang, saya pun mengisi formulir ketiga saya untuk FSI.
Seperti yang sudah saya pikirkan sebelumnya, teman-teman saya yang mendaftar FSI adalah kumpulan akhwat berjilbab lebar yang keislamannya bagus. Saya, dengan baju pendek dan ibadah yang bolong-bolong, selalu merasa lebih rendah jika berkumpul dengan mereka. Saya tahu, jarang sekali muslimah tidak berjilbab yang memilih FSI (di angkatan saya saja, hanya dua orang, saya dan Tikong). Tapi saya bertekad tidak mau kalah. Saya harus bisa masuk FSI. Saya harus memantapkan niat saya.
Kaderisasinya sih tidak terlalu berat. Saya bisa melaksanakan tugas-tugasnya dengan baik dan mengenal kakak-kakak tingkat yang baik-baik. Dan setelah saya mempelajari departemen-departemen di FSI, saya pun menegaskan: saya ingin masuk departemen Syiar. Ya, Syiar. Tadinya saya ingin masuk departemen Media dan Komunikasi (Medikasi) tapi tahun ini departemen itu di-merger dengan Syiar, jadi ya sudahlah. Lagipula, menurut saya, sebagai suatu departemen pentolan FSI, saya bisa belajar banyak hal tentang Islam di Syiar.
Maka saya mencatat pilihan saya: Syiar, PSDM (Pengembangan Sumber Daya Muslim), dan KDM (Keluarga Dokter Muslim). Sempat panik juga karena saat magang akhir, saya diminta magang di Humas (Hubungan Masyarakat).
Daaaaan....bismillahirrahmanirrahim....
"Departemen Syiar, Akhwat. Ayesya Nasta Lestari."
"Alhamdulillah!" saya menjerit bahagia. Saya berhasil mencapai impian saya! Saya masuk Departemen Syiar! Bergegas saya maju ke depan bersama Anggi dan Etik, dua teman saya yang juga terpilih masuk Departemen Syiar.
Enam bulan saya jalani bersama Syiar. Jujur saja tidak banyak yang saya lakukan, selain menjadi panitia buka puasa muslim dan sempat jadi PJ Konsumsi Cerdik (Ceramah dan Diskusi) yang akhirnya tidak jadi dilaksanakan. Tapi saya menikmati masa-masa itu, karena saya bisa nongkrong di ruang FSI dan alhamdulillah, mendapat hidayah untuk mengenakan jilbab.
Akhir tahun 2010 sampai awal tahun 2011 menjadi kesempatan bagi badan-badan untuk merombak kepengurusan dan memilih ketua baru, tak terkecuali FSI. Kami mengadakan Mukerta (Musyawarah Kerja Tahunan) di mana saya menjadi PJ Pubdok. Saya tidak bisa mengikuti Mukerta hari pertama, namun saya mengikuti hari keduanya. Dan saya diberi tahu, bahwa salah satu keputusan Mukerta hari pertama adalah mengadakan kembali Departemen Medikasi. Saya pun tertarik dan berniat untuk menjadi anggotanya.
Beberapa hari setelah Mukerta, saya mendapatkan sms dari Kak Amel, senior saya angkatan 2008 yang baru terpilih menjadi ketua keputrian (kaput). Sms itu tidak hanya ditujukan kepada saya, karena Kak Amel menyebut banyak nama orang lain di dalamnya. Namun intinya adalah menanyakan apakah saya bersedia diwawancara pada tanggal sekian. Saya pun mengerutkan kening dan membalas, "Buat apa kak?"
Kak Amel membalas santai, "Ada deh!"
Saya memberitahu beberapa teman saya mengenai sms itu dan bertanya-tanya apa artinya. Saat saya mengatakannya pada Afifah, ia langsung menyeletuk, "Aku tau kenapa!"
"Kenapa?" tanya saya heran.
"Kak Amel sama Bang Kevin kan lagi nyari ketua-ketua departemen baru. Terus waktu di FSI, Kak Amel nanya sama akhwat lain kira-kira siapa yang bisa jadi kadept Medikasi, Vinda nyalonin kamu!"
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH?!!!" saya spontan teriak.
Saya? Kadept Medikasi? Saya bahkan tidak mampu memimpin diri saya sendiri, bagaimana saya bisa memimpin orang lain? Saya langsung mencari Vinda untuk marah-marah, sekaligus bilang karena dia sudah menjerumuskan saya, dia harus masuk Medikasi bersama saya.
Tapi, seperti kata Kak Amel, amanah nggak pernah salah memilih pengembannya. Beberapa hari setelah saya diwawancara, saya mendapatkan sms ini.
"Selamat, Anda terpilih menjadi Kadept Medikasi."
Saya menghembuskan napas dan mengucap alhamdulillah. Saya masih belum tahu apa yang akan saya lakukan, tapi saya tahu saya telah diberi amanah untuk memimpin suatu departemen baru dan saya tidak akan menyia-nyiakannya. Jadi saya pun mulai bekerja.
Saya tidak akan bilang bahwa kepemimpinan saya di Medikasi berjalan mulus. Saya bukan kadept yang baik, saya tahu, tapi saya juga tidak mengharapkan anggota-anggota saya begitu cuek. Dengan usaha keras, saya berhasil melalui "cobaan" ini sampai ke pertengahan tahun.
Tapi, ada hal yang menyenangkan juga. Saya mempunyai sekbend yang sangat bersemangat, namanya Aravinda Pravita Ichsantiarini. Kak Amel banyak membantu proker saya, terutama Sumaru (suplemen mahasiswa baru). Dan saya akhirnya mendapatkan tiga anggota baru yang bersemangat, Arief, Tiara, dan Halida.
Jadi, yang ingin saya katakan adalah, saya sama sekali tidak menyesali waktu-waktu yang saya lewatkan di FSI. Baik saat saya masih di Syiar maupun sekarang saat saya mengetuai Medikasi. Bukankah kita memang harus berusaha untuk meraih kebahagiaan? :)
Mulanya, tidak ada niatan saya untuk memasuki organisasi ini. Oh, tentu saja saya tahu dan simpati pada FSI (hello, I'm a muslimah!) tapi saya tidak terlalu berminat memasukinya. Di mata saya, para anggota FSI ibarat bidadari-bidadari dengan jilbab lebar, rok panjang, dan baju longgarnya. Sedangkan saya, yang saat itu masih berstatus maba, cukup nyaman dengan blus berlengan pendek, rok selutut, dan rambut diurai. Bagaimana mungkin saya menjadi anggota FSI?
Singkat kata, setelah melalui proses mabim (masa bimbingan) yang cukup melelahkan, kami dipersilakan untuk mendaftar badan. Saat itu, pikiran saya langsung tertuju pada tiga badan yang saya minati: Media Aesculapius (MA), Badan Film Mahasiswa (BFM), dan Tim Bantuan Medis (TBM). Saya mengambil tiga formulir dan sudah mengisi dua formulir pertama dengan MA dan BFM ketika kata-kata dari teman saya mendadak membuyarkan impian saya.
"Ta....di TBM ada lat-fis (latihan fisik) lho."
Oh, tidak. Latihan fisik?! Itu adalah satu hal yang sangat saya benci. Oke, saya tahu ini tidak baik untuk kesehatan saya, tapi saya sangat benci olahraga. Dan saya tahu kalaupun saya nekat, saya takkan mampu menjalaninya. Maka saya mengurungkan niat mendaftar TBM.
Saya memutar otak kembali. Saya harus mendaftar badan apa kalau begitu? Tidak ada badan lain yang benar-benar saya minati. Mungkin saya sempat terpikir Senat, namun entah kenapa sesuatu memberitahu saya untuk tidak mendaftar Senat. Saya pun mencoba mengingatkan diri, apa yang saya inginkan untuk saya capai di kehidupan berorganisasi? Menulis, sudah saya usahakan dengan mendaftar MA. Perfilman, saya mendaftar BFM. Lalu apa lagi?
Mendadak saya teringat keinginan saya saat itu, yang saya rasa saya belum cukup mantap untuk mewujudkannya: memakai jilbab. Dan saya pun sampai pada satu kesimpulan, kalau saya mau memantapkan niat, tidak ada tempat yang lebih baik untuk mendukung saya selain FSI. Ya, FSI. Maka tanpa pikir panjang, saya pun mengisi formulir ketiga saya untuk FSI.
Seperti yang sudah saya pikirkan sebelumnya, teman-teman saya yang mendaftar FSI adalah kumpulan akhwat berjilbab lebar yang keislamannya bagus. Saya, dengan baju pendek dan ibadah yang bolong-bolong, selalu merasa lebih rendah jika berkumpul dengan mereka. Saya tahu, jarang sekali muslimah tidak berjilbab yang memilih FSI (di angkatan saya saja, hanya dua orang, saya dan Tikong). Tapi saya bertekad tidak mau kalah. Saya harus bisa masuk FSI. Saya harus memantapkan niat saya.
Kaderisasinya sih tidak terlalu berat. Saya bisa melaksanakan tugas-tugasnya dengan baik dan mengenal kakak-kakak tingkat yang baik-baik. Dan setelah saya mempelajari departemen-departemen di FSI, saya pun menegaskan: saya ingin masuk departemen Syiar. Ya, Syiar. Tadinya saya ingin masuk departemen Media dan Komunikasi (Medikasi) tapi tahun ini departemen itu di-merger dengan Syiar, jadi ya sudahlah. Lagipula, menurut saya, sebagai suatu departemen pentolan FSI, saya bisa belajar banyak hal tentang Islam di Syiar.
Maka saya mencatat pilihan saya: Syiar, PSDM (Pengembangan Sumber Daya Muslim), dan KDM (Keluarga Dokter Muslim). Sempat panik juga karena saat magang akhir, saya diminta magang di Humas (Hubungan Masyarakat).
Daaaaan....bismillahirrahmanirrahim....
"Departemen Syiar, Akhwat. Ayesya Nasta Lestari."
"Alhamdulillah!" saya menjerit bahagia. Saya berhasil mencapai impian saya! Saya masuk Departemen Syiar! Bergegas saya maju ke depan bersama Anggi dan Etik, dua teman saya yang juga terpilih masuk Departemen Syiar.
Enam bulan saya jalani bersama Syiar. Jujur saja tidak banyak yang saya lakukan, selain menjadi panitia buka puasa muslim dan sempat jadi PJ Konsumsi Cerdik (Ceramah dan Diskusi) yang akhirnya tidak jadi dilaksanakan. Tapi saya menikmati masa-masa itu, karena saya bisa nongkrong di ruang FSI dan alhamdulillah, mendapat hidayah untuk mengenakan jilbab.
Akhir tahun 2010 sampai awal tahun 2011 menjadi kesempatan bagi badan-badan untuk merombak kepengurusan dan memilih ketua baru, tak terkecuali FSI. Kami mengadakan Mukerta (Musyawarah Kerja Tahunan) di mana saya menjadi PJ Pubdok. Saya tidak bisa mengikuti Mukerta hari pertama, namun saya mengikuti hari keduanya. Dan saya diberi tahu, bahwa salah satu keputusan Mukerta hari pertama adalah mengadakan kembali Departemen Medikasi. Saya pun tertarik dan berniat untuk menjadi anggotanya.
Beberapa hari setelah Mukerta, saya mendapatkan sms dari Kak Amel, senior saya angkatan 2008 yang baru terpilih menjadi ketua keputrian (kaput). Sms itu tidak hanya ditujukan kepada saya, karena Kak Amel menyebut banyak nama orang lain di dalamnya. Namun intinya adalah menanyakan apakah saya bersedia diwawancara pada tanggal sekian. Saya pun mengerutkan kening dan membalas, "Buat apa kak?"
Kak Amel membalas santai, "Ada deh!"
Saya memberitahu beberapa teman saya mengenai sms itu dan bertanya-tanya apa artinya. Saat saya mengatakannya pada Afifah, ia langsung menyeletuk, "Aku tau kenapa!"
"Kenapa?" tanya saya heran.
"Kak Amel sama Bang Kevin kan lagi nyari ketua-ketua departemen baru. Terus waktu di FSI, Kak Amel nanya sama akhwat lain kira-kira siapa yang bisa jadi kadept Medikasi, Vinda nyalonin kamu!"
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH?!!!" saya spontan teriak.
Saya? Kadept Medikasi? Saya bahkan tidak mampu memimpin diri saya sendiri, bagaimana saya bisa memimpin orang lain? Saya langsung mencari Vinda untuk marah-marah, sekaligus bilang karena dia sudah menjerumuskan saya, dia harus masuk Medikasi bersama saya.
Tapi, seperti kata Kak Amel, amanah nggak pernah salah memilih pengembannya. Beberapa hari setelah saya diwawancara, saya mendapatkan sms ini.
"Selamat, Anda terpilih menjadi Kadept Medikasi."
Saya menghembuskan napas dan mengucap alhamdulillah. Saya masih belum tahu apa yang akan saya lakukan, tapi saya tahu saya telah diberi amanah untuk memimpin suatu departemen baru dan saya tidak akan menyia-nyiakannya. Jadi saya pun mulai bekerja.
Saya tidak akan bilang bahwa kepemimpinan saya di Medikasi berjalan mulus. Saya bukan kadept yang baik, saya tahu, tapi saya juga tidak mengharapkan anggota-anggota saya begitu cuek. Dengan usaha keras, saya berhasil melalui "cobaan" ini sampai ke pertengahan tahun.
Tapi, ada hal yang menyenangkan juga. Saya mempunyai sekbend yang sangat bersemangat, namanya Aravinda Pravita Ichsantiarini. Kak Amel banyak membantu proker saya, terutama Sumaru (suplemen mahasiswa baru). Dan saya akhirnya mendapatkan tiga anggota baru yang bersemangat, Arief, Tiara, dan Halida.
Jadi, yang ingin saya katakan adalah, saya sama sekali tidak menyesali waktu-waktu yang saya lewatkan di FSI. Baik saat saya masih di Syiar maupun sekarang saat saya mengetuai Medikasi. Bukankah kita memang harus berusaha untuk meraih kebahagiaan? :)
Selasa, 02 Agustus 2011
Saya Pembuat Lukisan Jelek
Suatu hari di sebuah pameran,
Dua laki-laki berjas hitam sedang mengagumi lukisan.
Salah satu di antaranya berkata,
“Hei, mari kita lihat yang di dekat sana.”
Saat mereka maju dengan langkah cepat
Mereka melihat sebuah lukisan, membuat laju mereka tersendat.
Lukisan yang tidak istimewa, dilukis dengan cat
“Jelek sekali,” komentar mereka.
“Mengapa lukisan sejelek ini bisa dipajang ya?”
“Iya, Mas, saya juga nggak tahu kenapa,”
Kata laki-laki muda yang ada di sebelah mereka.
“Menurut Mas-mas ini, apa yang jelek dari lukisannya?”
Langsunglah kedua lelaki berjas hitam itu bersemangat bercerita
Mengkritik dan mencela lukisan itu dari setiap aspeknya
“Oh, begitu ya Mas. Terima kasih.”
Kata si laki-laki yang bicara dengan mereka.
“Ngomong-ngomong, Mas ini siapa?”
Tanya seorang dari kedua lelaki berjas hitam itu penasaran.
Laki-laki itu menjawab sambil mengulum senyum,
“Saya yang membuat lukisan ini.”
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